20

3/3

I'll always return to and for those who're not scared of others and otherness.
When will they understand that there's a difference between direct democracy as in referenda and representational democracy as in general elections with a first past the post system?

"You looked surprised."
(Versing - Tethered)

---

The Border Force Officer checks my passport, holds it next to my face, takes a look at my photograph, stares at me, stares at the photograph again and finally asks me how old I am. As I reply thirty one, he says "damn," hands me my passport and lets me enter the UK. My face must have turned into a question mark as I leave the passport checkpoint.
As S and I roam through the terminal before leaving for the city, the flight attendant I asked about his day when entering the aircraft keeps bumping into us. He keeps on asking whether or not the Duty Free bag filled with - supposedly - sweets is mine. I decline. Five minutes later he sees us again. I decline again. Not sure if this is some form of payback for kindness.

The Bundespolizist checks my passport, stares at me quietly as I'm trying not to choke on a strand of hair I managed to wrap around my neck, and then stares at my passport again. He says nothing, neither smiles nor has any kind of an emotion on his face as he hands me my passport and allows me to enter Germany.
It takes another thirty minutes or so before people are able to grab their suitcases from baggage claim. They sigh and begin to compare the size of Heathrow Airport with Tegel Airport, and while they moan about how old fashioned and broken TXL is, I wonder what it would be like had they decided to build the second terminal according to von Gerkan's plans. The light in the terminal building as you enter the gates, a faint leftover of the 1970s and a lot of triangles and octagons.

"She dances like she's got a beat in her brain."
(Pete & The Pirates - Bright Lights)

19

2/3

I want to add all of this to my personal, my own bibliography. Lists and lists of impressions, something close to an imprint. Eliasson, remnants of the Jenny Holzer exhibition. Windows that are way taller than me, The Shard just opposite of where I lay my head. Staring at the ceiling, a lot of concrete, I am indeed freezing.
Keep going, there's a view to be enjoyed upstairs. I can't tell anyone how mad I am at the Tories whenever I am here. I can't tell anyone how welcome and unwelcome they can make you feel at the same time. Do I mind? It seems to me that I still don't. Don't let them win.

"Be happy when then sun shines
but when it’s too bright, don’t close your eyes."
(Working Men's Club - Bad Blood)

---

They still have an ear for those tiny bits and pieces that reveal time lived in a certain city. Time travels fast. Meanwhile I can't help but think take me to a nice place. This is a nice place, too.

"In my relentless state of charm."
(The Murder Capital - Don't Cling To Life)

18

1/3

There’s this thing about the way a city makes you feel. Does it know you're trying to not want to care? Does it want to be loved? Does it mind? Does it ask you to leave it behind, for better or worse?
Are you really there? Have you ever really been there? Did you grasp it all? Could you? Did you feel loved by it? Did you spend (not) enough time on the internet while you were there? Were you able to take pictures of it that are enough to satisfy your memories? Could you still draw details of the streets you walked along?

Did the air taste the way you like it in the evenings? Did it make you remember that certain smell you used to chase after while running down the street, towards the river? Were you able to roam through your neighbourhood like you used to? If not, why not try doing it again next time?
Does a city feel less like home just because it's not your home anymore? It probably still speaks to you on an emotional level, in exactly the same way the sea does.

A brutalist tour, maybe not only on the outside but also on the outside. Fresh perspectives - it's all good - and reminders of the humans you want in your life, back at your actual home. You'll ask questions and reply to what it is they want to know.

"Come home with me and it'll be alright."
(Summer Camp - Round The Moon)